The University, harbored in New Jersey and not well known because of its Princeton Tigers football team, has finally come clean on the gender issue. She [now read “it”] has come out with a set of guidelines for using gender inclusive language. (For first examples, see

And that is not all: there are also guidelines for gender inclusive housing as well (see:

Her [read “its”] scholarship has now reached into the gender bin, cleaned and polished it and found no taxonomy to support differences in nomenclature for, to begin with, man and woman

According to its website, Princeton University, which was chartered in 1746 and is the fourth-oldest college in the United States, is “a vibrant community of scholarship and learning that stands in the nation’s service and the service of humanity.” This quote is a little behind times, and to further the interest and scope of gender neutrality, it has been reported widely that the word humanity will be replaced simply by huity.

John Witherspoon was the founding president of the College of New Jersey, as Princeton University was first called. He was a Scottish-born American Presbyterian minister and a signer of the Declaration of Independence. Witherspoon is reported to be now turning (continuously) in his grave as he somehow finds that his foundation courses in moral philosophy have been replaced by courses on gender neutrality. God, John has learned, cannot be referred to as “he” and apparently the Virgin Mary will have to forego “she”.

There are more than 1,100 faculty members to instruct approximately 5,200 undergraduate students and 2,600 graduate students but, alas, we know not if they are male or female.

Despite its religious background, Princeton is now completely secular in viewpoint—for example no information on its “religious history” can be found by searching its archives. And, we should note, it is not related to Princeton Theological Seminary where, perhaps, faculty and students can still be referred to according to their biological (not perceived) gender.

Princeton Theological Seminary was established in 1812, founded by the General Assembly of the Presbyterian Church. “Affiliated from the beginning with the Presbyterian Church and the wider Reformed tradition, Princeton Theological Seminary is today a denominational school with an ecumenical, interdenominational, and worldwide constituency.” This is said to be reflected in the faculty, theological curricula, and student body.

The College of New Jersey, chartered in 1746, also by Presbyterians to educate ministers, later expanded its mission beyond training clergy and grew to become Princeton University.

The Seminary and the University are said to have “a collegial and supportive relationship, with some exchange privileges in course enrollment as approved by faculty”. The two schools lie at the center of the Princeton community, but are not affiliated. This is important to note because, apparently, Seminary men are still men and women are called women.

But there is trouble brewing for the University if it is to remain true to its gender neutral calling. This will require more cleansing. One can still find man in human and men in management, department, statement, and apartment; The men must be exorcised, just like the man has been in woman and the men in women.

There lurks a further gender problem, apparently not yet discovered by the seekers of hidden gender semantics. It is the word son, which the guidelines allow in such monstrosities as businessperson, chairperson, salesperson and, simply, person. Son is the gender opposite of daughter, which fortunately does NOT appear in the guidelines, although it is obviously not gender neutral.

A further note: the guidelines refer to the principal, which is the accepted term for headmaster or headmistress. However, as any real gender impartial sleuth should see, pal is generally a idiom for a close male friend and therefore should be exhumed.

There will be other problems: no more fraternity brothers or sorority sisters, both terms are heavily gender specific and to be avoided. So, too, are father and mother, even uncle and aunt and, especially nephew and niece. The latter two and perhaps others could be replaced by offspring. There is also no indication of what may transpire in the anthropology department, where gender is a legitimate study and the references to “he” and “she” are common.

This, of course, is only the beginning: to be gender neutral one must be unbiased and nonaligned. This will make it very difficult for Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump to speak at Princeton.

The really educated alum would echo their motto and say, “Vettesen Nov Tam” or “under the protection of God she [replace with “it”] flourishes.

August, 2016